Poop in the tub

I wish to everything that is holy that I was making this up...

Caden played HARD with his Purple Bomber car this afternoon & he smelled like a 100% little boy. I mistakenly said to Stan, "He really needs a bath tonight" and here he comes running.

"BATH!!! BATH!!!" and he's pointing to the bathroom & dancing in circles. This kid seriously loves bathtime.

So I get up & he goes and gets Stan and we make it a family affair. Midway through the bath, we start smelling something rank. The kid's got the toots & we're laughing and gagging at the same time. I decide that it's time to get him outta there before he does something REALLY gross.

As we're picking up the toys, I'm chanting, "Don't poop. Don't poop. Don't poop." Well what does he do? He squats down and starts grunting. Stan's fiddling in the office at this point. I'm screaming. Caden's pooping.

I pick him up & get him wrapped in the towel. He sees how hysterical I am and begins crying. I quickly calm him down & tell him he didn't do anything wrong, Mommy's just...well I don't know what I said at that point, but he calms down.

I get him into his room & on his dresser - thankfully he's still very clean. I have never gotten a diaper on that kid as fast as I did tonight. Stan's trying to leave to go get something to eat & I said, "You're leaving NOW?? While there's poop floating in the tub?" He got the hint & went to clean it up. Here comes part II.

Stan is very strong in so many things, but smells get him every time. As he's cleaning up the tub, he becomes physically ill. I immediately feel super guilty for making him do this & I'm trying to talk to him through the door, while trying to keep Caden out of the bathroom.

Caden is clean and hopefully not emotionally scarred from this trauma. Stan recovered well enough to go to McDonalds for dinner. And I'm kicking myself for letting a potty training golden opportunity slide right by. The potty was RIGHT there! All I had to do was pick him up & put him on it.

I WISH I was making this up...